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Belated New Year’s Resolutions
Better late than never I guess. Here is a list of my personal New Year’s resolutions for mobile devices.
1. Get a damn phone. Of course, I currently have a phone, but it doesn’t cut it any more. My trusty Nokia E63 is starting to show some age.
2. Find an honest mobile carrier. Easier said than done I know, but I’m praying that there is still one honest provider left somewhere.
3. Start using apps. I write about apps all the time, but hardly ever use them. (What a hypocrite eh?)
4. Use social media on my phone. Rather than waste time at home, it would be better to waste time with Facebook and Twitter on the bus.
5. Throw a bucket of cow dung at Steve Jobs. Cruel I know, but the man deserves it.
6. Get rich and screw…
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Sony Ericsson to Release the Elm
Sony Ericsson, the laughingstock of the mobile industry, will release a new device called the Elm. The Elm is part of the Greenheart line and is designed to appease the tree huggers and Greenpeace pinkos. In truth, the Greenheart family may be environmentally friendly, but it is really a cow dung of a line. The Elm does its best to continue the trend of mediocre designs. While the Elm does sport some respectable technical figures, reports of usability problems have already arisen by whistle blowers and critics. In truth, Sony Ericsson has become a misguided company, concerned more with petty accomplishments than anything pragmatic. At the end of the day, the most important factor contributing to the success of a mobile device is its usability. How many people, even the…
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HBO App for the iPhone
I nearly nutted in my trousers when I discovered that there is an HBO App for the iPhone. Some of the greatest contemporary shows have come from HBO. Think of the Sopranos, Sex and the City, Oz, Entourage, True Blood and Rome are just some of the television shows that have altered our perceptions and expectations of entertainment. The HBO app will let fans preview upcoming shows, check out behind the scenes footage and even send you an SMS reminder so you don’t miss your favorite show or movie. Expect this app to be much cleaner than the usual raunchy HBO product, as there is absolutely no way Apple would allow HBO’s normal content to see the light of day in the App Store. Naturally, the HBO app is free of charge and requires at least an OS of 3.0. As a true HBO fan,…
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Hamas Attempting to Create Mobile Network
The sneaky, resourceful and misguided brave freedom fighters slash evil terrorists known as Hamas are attempting to erect their own phone network. The reasoning behind this move is Hamas’ worry that the Israeli Defense Force eavesdrops constantly on Hamas operations in the Gaza Strip. Analysts do not believe that Hamas plans on creating a network for commercial reasons. The apparent sole purpose is to allow Hamas to communicate freely with each other, without worry and fear. It is speculated that the technology is making its way to Hamas from Iran. Why Hamas believe that Israel will be unable to hack into this new network remains a mystery, but you can’t fault Hamas for trying – feeble as the attempt may be. If the two sides invested more effort in peace negotiations,…
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What Phone to Buy Men for the Holidays
What works for women in the mobile world, does not always work for men. That is why the ladies need to think outside the box when getting a mobile phone for that special guy. For starters, your passionate love affair with cute and visually appealing phones is something that many men do not share. We like a power phone with loads of features and a muscular look, rather than the I Love Kitty crap that you go for. BlackBerry or Motorola Droid will do just fine thank you. Also, don’t place any stupid accessories on the phone. No stickers or furry sleeves please. Do that with your phone if you want, but not with ours. Also, don’t install your picture as the background before you give us the phone. We can do that on our own, thank you very much. And most important of all: if…
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Ten Boxing Day Tips Part 2
4) Bring a hot chick with you. There is nothing more distracting to the competition than a hot chick running around with a large rack and tight rear. Just make sure you’re not distracted as well.
5) Shop dirty. With all the pandemonium, no one will notice a well placed kick below the belt. While it may be considered cheating, if it helps you get that last iPod, so be it.
6) Do your homework. Get to know the store where you plan on finding your treasure. There is nothing more time consuming than running around a huge department store looking for a USB Drive.
7) Leave the high heels at home ladies. We know you want to attract the sausages, but spare yourselves the sprained ankles and wear runners instead.
8) Four hands are better than two. Bringing a…
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Ten Boxing Day Tips Part 1
Canadians have had a long and tumultuous love affair with Boxing Day. Being the cheap bastards that we are, there is nothing better than getting your hands on the latest Smartphone or computer at half the price. But how to make sure that you get what you want and how do you make sure that those around don’t claim the prize before you do? Here is a list of ten ways to ensure you get what you want:
1) Push old ladies aside early. While they are no much for you in a foot race, they can be potential landmines as you zigzag from aisle to aisle.
2) Run with your elbows cocked to the side. This will allow you to elbow potential competition while you are on the move.
3) Line up early. Places like Best Buy let people enter in groups and not all at…
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New Mobile Radiation Display Law?
The hippies in San Francisco are considering a mandatory display of radiation levels on mobile phones. Well, this possible new regulation isn’t a hippie thing, but rather an idea proposed by the rather erratic, impulsive and not completely competent mayor of San Francisco, Gavin Newsom. This proposal would force mobile merchants in the San Francisco area to display the radiation level, or SAR level, on every phone they sell, in a font size that would be at least as big as the price. While the FCC claims that every handset sold in the United States is safe for consumers, that is not enough apparently for the pride capitol of North America. There are two reason’s that Mayor Newsom should reconsider this proposal. 1) Most consumers won’t bother to even look at the SAR…
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Acer to Release Up to Six Android Devices in 2010
Big news out of Taiwan! Well known hardware manufacturer Acer has announced that it plans to release five to six different Android powered handsets in 2010. Acer is just one of the many handset manufacturers that have joined the Android party over the last year. Acer has promised to release a mixture of high end and budget phones in order to target several different market segments. Acer is better known for its hardware computer devices and accessories as opposed to mobile handsets. However, as with most technologically oriented companies, Acer can no longer ignore the tremendous strategic and monetary benefits that are achieved with a successful mobile device. Stay tuned for more information as Acer will surely reveal more about the handsets it plans to release. With…
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Android Market Reaches 20,000 Apps
Mobilecrunch.com has reported that the Android Market has surpassed 20,000 applications. It was no surprise that Android reached this important milestone. What is surprising is that just a mere 5 months ago, there were about half the amount of Android apps there are today. While we all recognize the increasing popularity of the Android OS over the last year, it was perhaps unexpected to see app developers jump on the Android bandwagon so quickly. 20,000 may seem like a miniscule number to some when compared to the outrageous 300,000 apps available in Apple’s App Store, but Android should be commended for increasing and improving their product in the face of a strong market leader like Apple. 2010 will perhaps be the year for the Android. With dozens of Android powered…
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